Admission (2013)

Starring Tina Fey, Paul Rudd, Wallace Shawn, and Lily Tomlin
Directed by Paul Weitz

Ok, I must admit that I finally sat down to watch another chick flick. I must admit I’ve been lazy. I also must admit that I was sick of chick flicks. I admit it. But, if I was going to watch a chick flick at least it could have Paul Rudd in it. And, Tina Fey can be funny. I admit, Tina Fey is funny. What else would you like me to admit?

Do you think I am going to admit that Admission is a good film? Ugh, I can’t really admit that. But, I do admit that it is an OK film. It isn’t really a funny film. It was a little more serious than I expected. I admit that. Maybe, the marketing team should admit that they tried to trick us. Is Paul Rudd funny in this movie? Not really. Does Paul Rudd always have to be funny? Not really. But, I do admit that I want him to be funny.

In Admission, Tina Fey works in the admissions department at Princeton University. She is very serious and devoted to work. In fact, she is in the running to take over as head of the department. One day, she gets a call from Paul Rudd who is running an alternative school in the northeast. He asks if she can stop by and give a presentation on Princeton to his kids. We learn that he is specifically interested in her meeting on kid, a kid that could also be her child that she gave up for adoption when he was born. Let the craziness ensue.

Do people still really want to get into Princeton? That is my question.

I have to admit that this isn’t the best review I’ve ever written. I admit it. Go to Princeton become a lawyer, and sue me.

FORCE THE BOYFRIEND:  5.5 out of 10 (They'll like but may not admit it)

Beer Pairing Recommendation

Bud Light.  A horrible beer selected by college students everywhere.

Hope Springs (2012)

Directed by David Frankel
Starring Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones, and Steve Carell

by Joshua Simpkins

Have you been married for decades? Has your marriage become stale, boring, or uneventful? Is the magic gone? Was there ever any magic to begin with? Do you and your spouse live different bedrooms? Is it time for a change? Do you want something more from your marriage? If you answered “Yes” to all these things then it just might be time for you to schedule an appointment with renowned marriage counselor, Dr. Feld (Steve Carell), in Hope Springs, Maine. He can help you turn your stuffy, worn-out marriage back into what it used to be, when you were young and in love. Run through those fields again, letting your hands brush through the tops of wild grass…wait? That’s sounds like that herpes commercial…Hmm…forget about that. Anyways, Dr. Feld can bring back the magic.

Kay (Meryl Streep) and Arnold (Tommy Lee Jones) have answered "Yes" to all the above questions. They have been married 31 years, sleep in different bedrooms, and barely speak to one another. They are in a rut. Kay is tired and wants something new. Arnold is unresponsive. She is unsure of what to do, until she discovers a book written by Dr. Feld (Steve Carell). Desperate to find something that works, she schedules Arnold and herself for an expensive week-long couples therapy with Dr. Feld in Hope Springs, Maine. Arnold is resistant to everything at first, but reluctantly agrees after Kay declares that she is going with or without him. Couples therapy begins and the hilarity ensues.

But, wait! You mean to tell me that there is not that much hilarity? That's not what the trailer, or marketing had me believe. I thought this was going to be hilarious! Where is the hilarity? Where is it? The truth is, this is a character study. This a simple movie about two people in a relationship. It is a movie about people talking. There are no bomb threats, no explosions, and no GGI, and not much hilarity. So, that is something that you should going into it. If you don't expect it, you might be disappointed.

A movie about people talking has got to have great acting for it to work and Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones are excellent in Hope Springs. Both actors come across as totally believable Midwestern middle-aged couple. Meryl’s performance is nuanced and subtle while Tommy Lee Jones really is that grumpy old man we see on the screen. It is perfect casting. Steve Carell is really great as the therapist, and for any "The Office" fans out there, you might find it hard to believe his performance when you see it. Somehow he pulls off not being Michael Scott. It is a tribute to his acting skills, as well.

FORCE THE BOYFRIEND: 5 out of 10 (Tough call.  If you plan on going to actual couples therapy with him in the future then let him skip it)

Beer Pairing Recommendation

(It's brewed in Maine and its strong.  For couples therapy you're going to need it)

For more about the chick flick, visit IMDB 

For more on Allagash Black, click here

One for the Money (2012)

Starring Katherine Heigl, Jason O'Mara, Daniel Sunjata with John Leguizamo, and Debbie Reynolds
Directed by Julie Anne Robinson

by Joshua Simpkins

One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, now, GO, CAT, GO! Seriously, you better go. I wouldn’t hang around. Get out while you still can. You still have time! Run…RUN! Run like your out on bail! Because, if you don’t, you might have to hang around and watch this movie. And, that’s not good for anyone! Believe me. I have seen it.

If your still are here, that is, if you are brave enough to hang around, then I’ll tell you a little about the movie. It stars Katherine Heigl as Stephanie Plum, a recently divorced and as-of-late unemployed Jersey girl. She is really down and out. The repo man came and took her car and she doesn’t know how she is going to pay her rent. She gets a job at her cousin’s bail-bond business and her first assignment is her high school crush, Joe Morelli (Jason O’Mara). The two have quite the checkered past. She enlists the help of Ranger (Daniel Sunjata) and the rest, as they say, is history.

This movie will probably be history soon (pun intended). It is based on a bestselling book, but if the book is any good I don’t think it translated too well to the big screen. And, honestly, I normally have a problem with Katherine Heigl, but she isn’t the real problem here. I wasn’t that big a fan of Morelli. I didn’t find his character that interesting. I really wished she would have quit chasing him and just busted a bunch of bad guys. The plot and writing left a little to be desired, as well.

For any Debbie Reynolds fans out there, you probably will have to watch this.  She doesn't come out of the woodwork too often and she is pretty funny as Stephanie's Grandmother.  For those of you who don't know who Debbie Reynolds is, then, well, you don't know who Debbie Reynolds is.  I will tell you that she is Princess Leia's Mother (in real life).  So, all you Star Wars fans can suck on that!  Wait, I'm a Star Wars fan.  I mean I don't dress up in the suit and go to Comic Con or anything, but...I'll just stop while I'm ahead.

So, in the end, my advice would be to skip this one all together. It isn’t that fun. And, even though it starts out OK enough. It gets really boring, really fast. Now, I’ll see you later. Go, cat, go. I don’t mean anything about cats leaving when I say this. Plenty of single women, have plenty of cats. Keep your cats. Give them a good home.

 FORCE THE BOYFRIEND:  1 out of 10 (Just go, cat, go)

Beer Pairing Recommendation 

This beer is horrible. It's just as bad as this movie. So, I think they go together perfectly. 

For more on the chick flick, visit IMDB

Friends With Benefits (2011)

Starring Justin Timberlake, Mila Kunis, with Patricia Clarkson, Woody Harrelson, Richard Jenkins, and Jenna Elfman  
Directed by Will Gluck

by Joshua Simpkins

Are there benefits to being friends? Sure, there are! First off, friends do nice things for each other all the time. They bring each other soup when they’re sick. They make each other laugh when they are sad. They play board games with them. And, those are just a few examples. So, I went into the movie expecting to watch friends do nice things to one another. In one way, I guess I was right. And, in the other, well… I never expected the nice thing to be SEX! What a surprise!

This movie is about Justin Timberland, aka JTIMB, and Mila Kunis who are friends. And, since, JTIMB is the one who brought sexy back…well…then…the benefit is (SPOILER)…SEX! Shhh, don’t tell anyone who hasn’t seen the movie yet. We don’t want to ruin for anyone.

JTIMB plays Dylan, a hot young executive, who meets Jamie (Mila Kunis), a headhunter from New York who convinces him to move from Los Angeles and take a job with GQ in the big apple. They become friends, and one drunken night, after watching a CHIFLI (short for – chick flick) decide to have sex as friends, with no emotions attached. And, that, ladies and gentleman, is how they become friends with benefits.

Do things become complicated? Of course they do! We wouldn’t have a proper CHIFLI if things didn’t get complicated. I mean, we learn, early on in the movie, with cameos by (SPOILER) Andy Samburg and Emma Stone, that both JTIMB and Milas are emotionally unavailable. But, as Woody Harrelson, who plays a gay co-worker puts it. The right relationship is NOT with the person you want to spend Friday night with. It’s with the person you want to spend with all day Saturday.

This one takes a while to get going. And, honestly, it takes awhile to get accustomed to JTIMB who thinks he is so cool and witty. All I kept picturing was him crying in that episode of PUNK’D. But, after you get into the movie a little bit, it gets better. There are some great performances from the supporting actors Richard Jenkins, Jenna Elfman, Woody Harrelson, and Patricia Clarkson.

 FORCE THE BOYFRIEND:  6 out of 10 (Unless he hates JTIMB)

Beer Pairing Recommendation 

This beer would go nicely with the Bluepoint Summer Ale.  It
will be your best friend.  Plus, it's from New York which is the main
setting of the movie.

For more on the film, visit IMDB 
For more on the beer, click here

Maid In Manhattan (2002)

Directed by Wayne Wang
Starring Jennifer Lopez, Ralph Fiennes, Natasha Richardson with Stanley Tucci and Bob Hoskins

by Joshua Simpkins

The Big Apple is one tough city. It’s a hard knock life. It’s particularly hard for a single Hispanic mother from the Bronx. Especially, when her no good ex-husband is off with some tramp spending the holiday weekend in Miami when he is supposed to be at his son’s speech for school and take him camping. It’s real hard! I hear you, girl! Preach it!

Meet Marisa, played by J-Lo, who is a maid at a high-end hotel in Manhattan. This hotel has rules, and Marisa follows them. She might even make manager one day. At least, that’s what her friend, Stephanie, thinks which is why she secretly applied for Marissa. Marissa doesn’t want it. She doesn’t think she deserves it. She doesn’t even think she deserves to try on a guests throwaway $5000 dollar suit. She’s J-Lo so she does anyways. Meanwhile, her son, who is wandering the hotel because his Dad has bailed on him for the weekend (see above, Preach it, girl!) meets New York politician Christopher Marshall (Ralph Fiennes) and brings him into the suite. Marshall sees J-Lo in the suit, mistakes her for a guest named Caroline, and BAM…we have a chick flick!

It's hard to believe J-Lo is a maid, but somehow it works. J-Lo makes us believe. Why? Because she is J-Lo. That's what she does. The decent cinematography and direction helps us believe as well. It's called suspension of disbelief. So, if you don't believe that J-Lo would be a maid in some swanky hotel in Manhattan. Well, then, Maid In Manhattan, might not be for you. If you can believe, like Seal says, that you could fly, and you believe J-Lo can be maid. Then, BAM...you have a chick flick to watch! Preach it!

LThis movie was better than I thought I was going to be. Like I said, J-Lo played Marisa with some believable depth, although the story had a few plot holes, it was completely enjoyable. I was wary about Ralph Fiennes as a love interest, but he played his the politician believably. It did of course have the cheesy line;

“Are your running away from something you want or running away because your afraid to want it?”

Or something like that. Believe me…it was the macaroni and the cheese.

A fun bit of trivia…this movie was originally supposed to be directed by John Hughes, based on a story he conceived. But, that fell through. Many of you will know John Hughes, through his 1980’s bratpack movies, Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, and Weird Science. I must say, John Hughes is the shizz! That would have been awesome!

FORCE THE BOYFRIEND: 5 out of 10 (It's up to whether or not he can believe!)

Beer Pairing Recommendation

A great beer to pair with Maid in Manhattan would be something delicious that you can drink at a upscale event. I would say something latin for that J-Lo flavor but I would still drink it at a big reception….Dos Equis Green. BOOM! Do it!

Remember, Please drink Responsibly

 

For more on Maid In Manhattan, visit IMDB 

For on Dos Equis XX Special Lager, visit DOS EQUIS

Waitress (2007)

Directed by Adrienne Shelly
Starring Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion, and Jeremy Sisto with Cheryl Hines, Adrienne Shelly and Andy Griffith

So, here is yet another movie, that I would have never subjected myself...and yet...I do again and again. A movie about a waitress who is into making pies..boooriing. She is unhappy in her marriage...booorinng. She wants to start a new life for herself...boooring. She's pregnant...booring again. This thing had chick flick fluff garbage all over it. And, yet, I still sat down to watch it (this time with an Yuengling Original Black and Tan). And, in the end, I actually enjoyed it.

"Waitress" stars Keri Russell (think "Felicity") as Jenna, a Waitress (surprise!) whose desperate plan to leave her controlling husband Earl, played by Jeremy Sisto, is foiled when she discovers she is pregnant with his baby. Not the type of woman who would give up a baby, she decides to keep it which leads her to meet the new Doctor in town, played by Nathan Fillion (think "Two Guys, A Girl, and A Pizza Place"). She is not happy about this pregnancy or her life but still gets tons of support from her co-workers, and Andy Griffith. The only think she really loves in life is making pies, and she is really an artist when it comes to making pies.

That's it. That's the set-up. What do you think will happen? Well, you'll have to watch it. I'm not going to tell you here. I will say this. I do find after watch all these chick flicks with their cookie-cutter characters and plots, etc. that whenever one is made with a writer/director it does make that chick flick a lot more interesting. There are some pretty surreal moments in "Waitress", strange things that wouldn't normally be seen in your average chick flick. I think its for the better. And, I craved pie throughout the entire movie.

"Waitress" is actually very entertaining once you allow yourself time to get into it. This is because the characters are so (should I use the chicky word) "endearing". Although, it took me a little while to get used to non-southern actors using southern accents. And, if you have problems with non-southern actors using southern accents then you know what I'm talking about. These aren't that bad so you get used to them pretty quickly.

The Yuengling's Original Black and Tan. I really recommend this if your a fan of Black and Tan. It's probably the next best thing to getting one in a bar.

This movie is overshadowed by the death of the actor/writer/director Adrienne Shelly who was murdered during post-production on this film. It's actually a very sad and tragic story. If you want to know more check her out on imdb or wiki it.

FORCE THE BOYFRIEND: 7 out of 10 (1 mean he'll hate it, 10 means he'll love it)

Watched if you liked...any chick flick whatsoever.

Chick Flick: 4 cartons of ice cream (out of 5)
DVD: 3 pieces of milky chocolate (out of 5)-a nice homage to director Adrienne Shelly
Beer: 5 manly high fives (out of 5)- but then again, I love Black and Tans

All About Steve (2009)

Directed by Phil Traill
Starring Sandra Bullock, Thomas Hayden Church, and Bradley Cooper

I’ve got to give it to Sandra Bullock in 2009. She popped up in 3 movies, in 3 completely different characters, and she really did an excellent acting job in all of them. It doesn't really matter if you liked the movie or not, she is good in all of them. So, if you want to continue along these lines, then we can step outside, I'm fine with it. Let's go.

In All About Steve, she plays Mary Magdalene Horowitz, a not-so-simple-know-it-all Jewish Catholic woman who creates crossword puzzles for a living and really can’t seem to shut up. When we meet her she is about to meet Steve, a blind date, that her parents have set her up with. They meet and for some odd reason, mostly looks alone if not horniness, she decides Steve is the one. She jumps him in his Bronco he can pull out of the driveway, and he is game, that is until she begins to talk and talk and talk which, in turn freaks him out and he quickly makes up an excuse and leaves. Somewhere in his quick departure he says he “has to work” and “wishes that she could come with him”. She goes home and writes a crossword puzzle that is “All about Steve”, the taste of his lips, the color of his hair, etc. It is published and she gets fired. She sees her termination as a sign that she should go and me be with Steve and quickly runs off across the country to meet him.

Sandra does an excellent job as Mary, in fact, I really do forget that it is Sandra Bullock about 15 minutes in to the movie. Do not get me wrong, she is not going to win an Academy Award for this. In fact, no one associated with this is going to win an Oscar. It’s has a lot of faults, like most chick flicks. But, it is, in my opinion, refreshingly different. I really couldn’t tell where the movie was going even though I thought I could and can in just about every other chick flick that I have watched. There were some pretty funny moments, and it is a good turn for Thomas Hayden Church who is really always pretty great.

The soundtrack was a little odd to me. It seemed to be right out of 2000. The song that is played at the climax of the movie is by the song Train. You know the one. The one that goes, “did you wish upon....a shooting…star…something…something… something….”. I think I even heard some Sugar Ray, and maybe some that song “Be my butterfly…sugar…baby.” Maybe not. Listen to the songs…you’ll know what I was talking about.

As far as the beer goes…I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I forgot to drink a beer for this one. I even had it all picked out. It was a coffee flavored, or coffee-inspired beer, and I really meant to drink it. I just forgot. Maybe that tells you something about the movie. Maybe not. Oh well, I’ll drink it next.

Final Analysis...Sandra Bullock's acting rises above the rest of the movie...I believed she was the crazy ass character...maybe you will too maybe you want...my guess is...you'll either like this movie or think it sucked.

FORCE THE BOYFRIEND: 5 out of 10 (1 means he'll hate it, 10 means he'll like it)

Watch if you liked....The Proposal or Sandra Bullock.

Chick Flick: 3 cartons of ice cream (out of 5)
DVD: 1 pieces of milky chocolate (out of 5)
Beer: 0 manly high fives (out of 5)

The Top 7 Chick Flicks of the 2000's -or- How Us Guys Learned to Stop Stressing and Just Watch The Chick Flick And Possibly Learn Something

If I've learned anything from watching all of these chick flicks it's that (Surprise!) some of them really aren't that bad. And, that some of them are really, really bad. Guys have been subjected to all kinds of horrible chick flick torture, and I know that secretly many of them ended up enjoying the movies that they were forcefully subjected to. So, in honor of 2010, I've compiled the Top 7 Chick Flicks of the 2000's and included a couple things us guys (and girls) may have learned from watching them.

7. My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)- This was a sleeper hit that no guy in his right mind would have ever wanted to see but when we did it actually wasn’t that bad. Like, Bridget Jones's Diary (see no. 5), hopefully, you women realized that guys perceive you differently than you might see yourselves. But, this movie was necessarily about the couple’s relationship with each other as much as it was about their relationship with her family. And, what a big, fat, greek family it was. This movie had a big heart which I think is necessary to any successful chick flick. See my review here.

6. Devil Wears Prada (2006)- The reason this movie is so good is because by the end of it we forget that its Meryl Streep acting. She’s that good. Maybe, us guys learned that you gotta let a girl go out there and do her own thing. Maybe you girls learned that you can’t please everyone all of the time. Hopefully, all of us learned to stand up for ourselves a little bit. Personally, I think the devil really does wear Prada.

5. Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001)- If there is anything us guys learned from Bridget Jone’s Diary it was how cute and fun a girl with a “little extra meat on her bones” could be. Hopefully, if it taught you girls anything it’s that guys aren’t as picky and finicky about your body as you think we are (not most of us anyway). This movie was all about personality and it had a lot of it. It spawned a not-so-great sequel and we’ve been wishing Renee would go ahead and eat something ever since.

4. How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days (2003)- If anything can be said about Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson its that they can be really hit-or-miss (for bad Kate Hudson see “Bride Wars”; for bad Mr. Matt see, “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past”). But, whatever the case, the planets must have aligned and brought them together for HTLAG10D because they are both at their absolute best. Maybe both sexes learned that games aren’t funny. Or, maybe we didn’t learn anything. Doesn’t really matter, this movie is pure entertainment.

3. Legally Blonde (2001)-This movie was a cute comedy with a heart of gold (cheesy, I know…I thought of that myself) and made Reece Witherspoon a superstar. It schooled us guys to not judge a book by its cover and really taught everyone that blondes really do have more fun. Two horrible sequels have followed (the most recent called “Legally Blondes”) but we’ll just all try to remember Elle Woods as she was in this original chick flick. You go girl.

2. Love Actually (2003)- While this was an extremely well written movie with an amazing ensemble cast I think it was the underlying message, “Love actually is all around,” that made it such a great film. There were many lessons to be learned from this film (for both sexes). Maybe it was to appreciate the love your already have in your life. Or, for us guys, maybe it was just to verify that if we go to a different country we become exotic, immediately meet 3 amazingly hot roommates, and get to have the best sex of our lives. Whatever it was, I think the scenes of couples embracing at the airport, that bookend the film, really show what this film was all about.

1. The Notebook (2004)- This chick flick is great for so many reasons (see my review). One, the trailer looked horrible and made me throw up in my mouth. It looked like overly sentimental trash. And, maybe it was overly sentimental. But, in all the right ways. What did we guys learn from this? Maybe it’s to never give up on our dreams. Or, possibly, we don’t have to fight the fiance to get back the girl. He’ll be gracious about it and give her up without a fight. I’m really not going to go into why this movie is so great. If you don’t know why it’s great then you haven’t watched it…I mean really watched it. See my review here.


Runners Up (and why they didn't make it);

Sweet Home Alabama (2002)- because I hate movies with bad southern stereotypes

Mamma Mia (2008)- because not everyone loved it as much as I did...and that's understandable. See my review here.

Sex and The City: The Movie (2008) because I didn't learn anything from it...because I couldn't make it past the first 20 minutes. See my review here.

The Sweetest Thing (2002)- because while it is the first female "gross out" comedy. Well, I just didn't like it enough. See my review here.

Notting Hill (1999)- because it's actually from the 90's.

The Holiday (2006)- because...well, actually...I'm not sure because I really like this movie so maybe I should have included it. My bad.